when you let someone into the mind of You, you give them more than just body and soul- you give them understanding into the workings of your brain and the blocks of pain built up that equal the insecurities of you.

i try so hard to forget the memories, the sex, the touching, the sounds that i mistake for being wrapped up inside of him. how every beautiful note of a certain song spells out the exact moment he first penetrated me or the night i felt his warm tears drip onto my hand.

i need the security of his memorization of my madness. how he could hold onto and interpret every tear. he had to have known how much he destroyed me. and maybe i shouldn't have made him feel guilty about that,

or maybe

i should have made him feel

everything.

2002-01-22, 3:52 p.m.
design by bluechicken

previous����next