last night i wrote a very intense handwritten letter to benjamin. it was about recovery and how much maturity comes in being put through it that hard. about the calmness i'm allowed because i have his hand to hold when i'm about to pass out in nyc. about all of life's love and sex, defined and not. i went on and on in this letter, editing nothing, and signed my name.

this morning i mailed it off to someone whose name i found in the phonebook.

2003-06-01, 6:37 p.m.
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